Saturday, February 27, 2010
episode: -> devastated. <-
i had an extremely unpleasant roller-coaster ride up and down my mental and emotional health these few days.
my devastation is also reflected upon my puffy face, swollen eyes, and a sad and troubled outlook.
i thought he still loved me.
i have never doubted his feelings.
but tonight the lightning(s) and thunder(s) struck me.
he told me his feelings are not the same for me anymore.
it is only a mere ten days after the breakup caused by misunderstandings.
despite already clearing up the differences and misunderstandings.
he still had a change of heart, just like that.
this seriously caught me unaware and off-guard.
it completely broke my heart and shattered me.
*my heart splits wide open, and the blood spills out, yet it refused to stop flowing.*
when he doubted my love.
when he doubted whether i would have a change of heart.
when he doubted whether i would run off with another guy.
his feelings changed first.
the cruelty and heartlessness of a guy who claimed he used to love me.
why and how did we become like this?
all are just pure misunderstandings!
why couldn't we sit down and work things out?
why must he give up easily without a try?
i thought it was the difficulty posed by him going overseas to pursue further studies.
but his feelings actually changed.
i have totally never expected that.
i am left alone.
searching for the shadow of the person who will never return.
i am all alone.
waiting for the message or call from the person who will never call again..
~ Beautiful Season ~